Thomas Big Pine (elhoserboy) wrote,
Thomas Big Pine
elhoserboy

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Ra Is Rad

Thanks largely in part to Kat and Lauren, I now sleep away the precious few hours of the day when the sun is up and go about my "daily" business, awake and alert, in moonlit darkness.

This recent turn of events got me to thinking about just how much I depend on the sun, not only for its life-sustaining light and heat, but for its ability to brighten my day emotionally. Because of this, I logically came to the conclusion that I really should start worshipping the Sun.

Not logical you say? How dare you! It's human nature to question one's existence. And though it is a great question, we all know that no concrete answers exist. Most people either believe in Creationism by some higher power or some form of the Big Bang Theory combined with Evolution. However, neither can be proven.

I'm going to forget about how I got here because it's driving me insane. Instead, I'm going to focus on daily existence and it's direct relation to the Sun. Here's what can be proven, scientifically, about my new God, the Sun.

- He is the sole energy that sustains life, as we know it
- When He expires (and He eventually will) all life, as we know it, will cease

It's simple really and I like simple things. Now, I'm thinking that I'll call my new religion "The Church of What's Happening Now" and, please keep in mind that this is all very preliminary, but it would work something like this:

Our "Sun Temples" (churches) would be giant pyramids, not only because of the obvious historical association, but also because I really dig anything Egyptian. Inside each Sun Temple would be a giant map of the world. The area on the map currently being graced by the Sun's presence would be illuminated and the areas waiting to receive His goodness and warmth would be displayed in shadow. The map's display would change as the earth rotated. In addition to the map there would also be depictions of the four seasons, calendars, and other Sun-associated memorabilia. There would be no priests or rabbi's or anything of that nature in the Sun Temples and you would not be required to congregate in one at any given time. You would come and go as you please, or not at all, and just be with yourself and your thoughts.

Sunrise and Sunset would be extremely holy. Each morning you would be required to go outside, so that you could clearly witness the miracle that is a Sunrise. (Don't go to a Sun Temple) You would thank the Sun briefly for rising, and for His continued warmth and light. Then you would go about your day.

Your day would be yours and yours alone. There would be no moral guidelines for you to follow. The Sun merely gives life - He does not judge it.

The Vernal Equinox, Summer Solstice and things of that nature would also be holy days of observation, but rules for observing them have yet to be worked out.

At Sunset, you would be required to witness Him vanish below the horizon, leaving you in darkness and anticipation for the next Sunrise. You would briefly acknowledge that He has given you another day and humbly request that He rise again.

At this point, I'm sure most of you are sold on "The Church of What's Happening Now," but the deep thinkers among you are probably wondering aloud, "What about the moon?" Well, unfortunately for the moon, it would not be visible in our sky without the Sun, and so it would not have any place in the religion. However, seeing the moon illuminated in the night sky would almost certainly serve as a comforting reminder that the Sun, while not directly shining on you, was still shining somewhere.

One more detail of note would be our prophet/celebrity spokesman. Christians and Jews have Jesus, Muslims have Mohammed, the Church of Scientology has Tom Cruise, etc. We would have George Hamilton. Clearly he appreciates all that the good Sun has to offer, and because he's quite popular, he would be instrumental in getting our message out to the masses.

Whether you subscribe to my new religion or not, I do hope you at least recognize that the Sun, although not likely the creator of life, does a mighty fine job sustaining it.

It's currently 9:30PM. The Sun will rise tomorrow at 6:48AM.

God willing...
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  • 12 comments

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